20 Negative Thoughts Reframed

By Paint Her in Color Founder, Laura Spiegel

We all know the difference between a glass half full and a glass half empty. I admit that my natural inclination is usually toward the latter. Seeing the negative in most situations is, I don’t know, just easier. But sometimes my own mental narrative gets in the way of my ability to be in the moment and see the blessings around me.

Here are twenty negative things I told myself within the last twenty-four hours. And twenty attempts to reframe my thoughts and see the bigger picture.

1. Yet another gray sky. Only four months of winter to go. --- I have the freedom to be outside, breathe in clean air, and get worked up over something as trivial as the color of the sky.

2. Seriously? The kids are wrestling again? You’d think the knocked-out teeth would remind them to be more careful. --- They are actually playing together. Those are giggles, not screams.

3. My car smells like last week’s socks. The cracks between seats are a rainbow of filth. The cup holder is alive. --- I have a car that can take me places. My kids are clearly not hungry.

4. Three minutes to get to school before the tardy bell rings. Eighteen cars ahead of us in line. And they’re not even hurrying. -- My kids can dress themselves, even it takes twenty minutes of prompting to make it happen. They can go to school and learn. They are surrounded by loving educators and friends they love.

5. These people took a perfectly good article and ruined it. You can’t put “such as” in every single sentence. --- I have a job. I get to write. I can help take care of my family.

6. Your question was clearly answered in the last email. Are you trying to waste my time? --- I have time to be wasted.

7. Who are these morons on social media? --- I live in a community that has freedom of speech.

8. Seriously? The only available doctor’s appointment is at 7 AM? Downtown? This should be good. ---- We have access to doctors and medicine. We live in the same city as a children’s hospital. I am comfortable advocating for my daughter.

9. That house is the color of a sullen Smurf. Where is the HOA when you need them? -- I live in a safe community where non-uniform home colors count as problems.

10. I have the hands of a ninety-five-year-old. --- I have access to soap and clean water to keep my hands clean. I am doing my best to keep my daughter safe and healthy.

11. I’ve never seen such a slow-moving checkout line. Or such stuffed carts. There are thirty shopping days left until Christmas, people. --- I am able to get out of the house. I have access to stores and resources.

12. This birthday party is a cluster. Who’s in charge here? --- My daughter was invited to a party. She has playmates who hug her when she enters the room.

13. Yes, it’s leftovers again. Frozen pizza leftovers. Who am I, Martha Stewart? --- My kids will go to bed with their bellies full. Maybe tomorrow, we’ll add in a bit more fruit.

14. Dirty dishes are everywhere. Would it kill someone to take a plate to the sink? --- I fed my family tonight.

15. What are those screams coming from the bathroom? Is it that hard to share a bottle of shampoo? ---- My kids are able to bathe themselves. And my son is snorkeling in the bathtub with his goggles on…

16. Seriously? Another fight over who gets to place the star on top of the Christmas tree? I’m ready to dropkick the whole thing. --- We are together in our warm home. It’s almost Christmas time!   

17. 10:30, and we’re fighting about bedtime again. There are NO MORE STORIES! ---- I have kids with strength of conviction and fighting spirits. Maybe they can fall asleep by the light of the tree tonight.

18. Another swift kick to the behind at 3 AM. Why can’t my son sleep in his own bed? --- I have a son who makes his way to my bed for snuggles in the night. I have this sweet boy to hold.

19. Welp, yet another sleepless night. --- I have coffee. It smells good. The sun is peeking out from the clouds. I get to have another morning with the people I love.

20. The fifth shout of “MOMMY!” within an hour. What could she possibly need? --- My daughter has a voice, and she wants to interact with me. And she’s found my glasses! Look at that sweet smile as she delivers them to me. She is so very loved, and I am so very, very blessed.

Putting together this list was sadly, not hard at all. And what’s remarkable is that there was nothing particularly stressful or challenging about this past day. No one was ill. No one got hurt. Nothing terrible happened at work. Heck, I didn’t even turn on the news to plug into all the fighting! And yet, my mind found ways to take perfectly normal, mostly good things, and view them with negativity.

So, here’s my challenge to myself. For the next twenty-four hours, I’m going to be more mindful of my internal dialogue. When I feel myself skewing sarcastic, I’m going to pause, close my eyes, and take a few deep breaths. When I open my eyes again, I’m going to try to see the world around me as it really is. Messy. Unpredictable. But also so very, very blessed.

What helps you be more present and see the beauty around you? Drop me a line at laura@paintherincolor.com or share your ideas at facebook.com/paintherincolor.